...is sponsored by Cottonelle Ultra ComfortCare toilet paper
Why? Because it's the best damn toilet paper on the market and you don't let guests use it. You buy that Walmart shit for 68 cents a four-pack for your guests because who cares if they get ass rashes. However, the silky smooth feeling of that soft cottonelle tissue paper only gets to be used on your ass because it's your house and you're the king.
The New York Jets select:
Sam Darnold, QB, USC
The Jets will take somewhere between one and five seconds making this pick because otherwise they might have been looking at a tough decision between Josh Allen and Baker Mayfield. Now they can take the quarterback they want, sit out the rest of the day and start looking into offensive linemen and skill players in the 3rd-4th rounds.
The New York Jets select:
Sam Darnold, QB, USC
The Jets will take somewhere between one and five seconds making this pick because otherwise they might have been looking at a tough decision between Josh Allen and Baker Mayfield. Now they can take the quarterback they want, sit out the rest of the day and start looking into offensive linemen and skill players in the 3rd-4th rounds.
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