The 32nd and final pick of the 2018 CMC Draft...

...is sponsored by Sweet Pickles kids entertainment.

Because the advent of the smartphone/tablet has thrown this children’s material into a dumpster fire.  Kids just want a gdamn touchscreen.

The Super Bowl Champion Philadelphia Eagles select:

Jaire Alexander, CB, Louisville

The Eagles 🦅 take advantage of this board riser and purely pick their best player available.

The 31st Pick of the 2018 CMC Mock Draft....

...is sponsored by the 2002 USC Song Girls

Pick the ones Carson Palmer, Matt Leinart and Reggie Bush smashed during that season.

The New England Patriots select:
Sony Michel, RB, Georgia
Great value pick for the Patriots, who hope Michel can replace the production from Dion Lewis and the soon-to-be departed James White.

The 30th Pick in the 2018 CMC Mock Draft...

...is sponsored by shrimp scampi

Shrimp, butter, lemon juice and parsley...never fails.

The Minnesota Vikings select:

Mike Hughes, CB, UCF

The Vikings already overpaid for a quarterback they didn't need so now they draft the cornerback they do need after Nick Foles lit them up like a Christmas tree in the NFC championship game.

The 29th Pick in the 2018 CMC Mock Draft...

...is sponsored by this photo of Ron Cey, former LA Dodger great of the 70's-80's.




Move over David Hasselhoff!  This was the real ladies man who had a grrrreaaat time with LA's finest.

The Jacksonville Jaguars select:

Courtland Sutton, WR, SMU

Allen Hurns is out, and this big-bodied WR will need to make a big leap.  Bortles needs WR's to bail his inaccuracy out.

The 28th Pick in the 2018 CMC Mock Draft

The 28th Pick in the 2018 CMC Mock Draft is sponsored by Pittsburgh Steeler Fans

You are the worst fans in the league.  You take personal credit for the success of the teams as if you actually played for the Steelers.  No one likes Steeler fans (or Penguins for that matter)



The Pittsburgh Steelers Select Derrius Guice RB LSU

The Steelers need a plan B for Leveon Bell who is getting older and threatens to hold out for more money every training camp.  Bell is the man but we've seen these running backs disappear almost overnight.  Guice is a big durable back in the mold that has done well in the AFC north for a long time.

The 27th Pick in the 2018 CMC Mock Draft

The 27th Pick in the 2018 CMC Mock Draft is sponsored by Red Burrito

How bad is your brand that you cannot even stand on your own and a brand as weak as Hardee's is supposed to help you sell your crap. Red Burrito is like Taco Bell if it was possible for Taco Bell to suck more than it already does.


The New Orleans Saints Select Hayden Hurst TE South Carolina

The Saints are missing that Jimmy Graham TE and Hurst is the answer.  He's a big fast athlete who will catch alot of passes from Brees in 2018.  If you're Hurst you can't wait to get down to New Orleans as anybody that lines up in that offense gets video game stats.

The 26th Pick in the 2018 CMC Mock Draft...

is sponsored by the Kyocera Duraforce Pro.



Seriously - who in the fuck buys this?  Is it sold somewhere in Kyrgysztan?


The Atlanta Falcons select:

Frank Ragnow, C/OG, Arkansas

Boring as hell pick, yet this is a well-rounded player who can move around Center and Interior Guard positions bringing a big value.  This poses well star players RB Devonta Freeman and QB Matt Ryan.  It all starts with O-line.  With Taven Bryan/Maurice Hurst still being on the table, this could be a poor move.  The hope is one of them are there in round 2.